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Hilarious Hollywood

A weekly column that pokes fun at everything Hollywood, news & politics.

The theme is BALLS for this week.

Robin Thicke was recently interviewed and questioned regarding his much-publicized soppy cringe inducing tributes to his wife. The alleged (caught in the act) cheating crooner blamed his sudden success (which took 10 years I might add) on his issues. Said, Thicke, "I did not know how to juggle fame, and all of a sudden the balls were all over the place." Er, Ya think?

Meanwhile, the Brazilian football/soccer team said, "dude, we feel the same way!"

Speaking of cheating or balls, or both, 'Clinton The Musical' a raucous farce parodying the sex scandal that rocked the White House makes it's U.S. debut this month during the New York Musical Theater Festival. The musical depicts Bill and Hillary Clinton's attempts to save the presidency following his affair with former White House intern Monica Lewinsky.

"Our play is a loving poke at Bill Clinton," Duke LaFoon, who portrays the Bill who gets into trouble, said at a preview.

This should be a success, as we know how Bill loves a poke! He also still firmly believes he was robbed the Oscar for his impeachment speech.

Meanwhile in the current Whitehouse, photos of the Presidents' daughter Malia, (a new face in LA LA land), have surfaced hanging out at a popular paparazzi restaurant Gjelini, in Venice Beach, Malia was also working and having a Monster's ball on the new Halle Berry TV show. Luckily, the Whitehouse were able to prioritize and stop all publications of the 16 year old at the Hollywood spot, but sadly the photos of Israel and Hamas escalating their military confrontation on Tuesday, with Israel carrying out extensive air attacks in response to heavy rocket fire against militants in Gaza...still

happened.... Priorities!

Malia said the food was "uh, like, er like, great. Like." The good news is President Obama should be due on another non-political TV show soon.

Jenny McCarthy on the other hand needn't await any calls from the psychic networks for her new TV career after her sudden exit from The View.

In the latest issue of New You Magazine, she shared that she has been participating in many critical thinking courses lately. Clearly she has not been using her crystal ball. Jenny was asked where she would be in 20 years, "Believe it or not I think I am still on The View."

Sherri Shepherd who was also 'let go' from the show allegedly said, "we are f*#%ed."

But, hold on, The View became interesting again, Rosie O'Donnell is back, or so my sources tell me. I love me some Rosie! Rosie will hopefully be joining co-host Whoopie Goldberg on the morning show, on which Rosie and Whoopi will be breaking balls! They will argue, shout, roll their eyes and fight to the death with every fascist on the show, gay activists everywhere where high fiving and fist pumping!

Ready, set DVR, Go!

Everyone is having a ball in this week's column, playing ball breaking balls, juggling balls or blaming balls everywhere!

Beyonce's father, Mathew Knowles is not missing out, he is juggling more balls than he can handle with yet another paternity suit from Taqoya Branscomb, who claimed he fathered her daughter born in 2010. All the single ladies are loving on this man it seems.

Meanwhile Beyonce's ball-breaking sister, spitfire Solange has been sleeping in his elevator for a week?

Greatest ball breaker all week?

Novak Djokovic won the Wimbledon much coveted 2014 men's singles title after beating Roger Federer in an epic five-set final battle. After collecting the historic trophy, he jokingly thanked the Swiss player, "for letting him win."

Federer allegedly said something about nailing balls to a wall?

And finally, biggest balls of all, Seth Rogen is da man! North Korea has complained to the United Nations about a film called The Interview starring Seth Rogen and James Franco, accusing the United States of sponsoring terrorism and committing an act of war by allowing production of a movie about a plot to kill its leader, Kim Jong Un. Seth remained un fazed and quipped on twitter "people don't usually want to kill me for one of my movies until after they have paid 12 bucks for a movie ticket!" Kim Jong Un was unavailable for comment as he was apparently busy executing the relatives of his uncle, you know, the one he, er......executed. Now that takes balls!

 

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